Independence Day explained by Greg “bottle rocket” Perry:
On this Independence Day, celebrate your country’s freedom on the anniversary of the Declaration of Independence.
For those of you who want suggestions on how to honor your freedom, you can:
- Go to a Government-approved fireworks stand
- Located at a Government-approved location
- Buy the Government-approved fireworks
- Pay for them with Government-approved money
- Add the Government-approved sales tax
- Take them to a Government-approved location
- Shoot them in a Government-approved manner
- Using Government-approved matches
… Or you will be arrested.
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